Dad, I wrote a letter to the president and law makers

My daughter must have met her wit’s end last evening with her father.  She arrived home to say that her dad was being rude to them, and that she told him how she wrote a letter to the president.  The information was relayed in 8 year old form, so it was somewhat peacemeal, but apparently there was a conversation that started with something to do with the law for children to sit in the backseat.  Their father was telling our son that he thinks that the law is “bullshit”.  It’s stunning to listen to an 8 year old mimic these words – as she told me how he kept saying “It’s bullshit, <son’s name>. It’s just bullshit.”  My daughter stepped in to say that it wasn’t bullshit, and that it was there for the kids SAFETY. (go daughter!).   Ex then tells them how he grew up without it, and daughter argues that people get smarter and now we know better.  (again… go daughter!).

Then there was the conversation where she told him “all you do is hit, Dad.  Hit, hit, hit. You get angry and you hit us.  Well, you know what, there should be a law against that.”.  Apparently he mocked her at some point, and said “What, are you going to send me to jail?”  And she explained that there should be consequences, and she wrote a letter to the President asking him to change it to a law.

Apparently he was very dismissive to her about it.  Basically waving his hand away in a “whatever” fashion, but also telling her directly “F- you” (without the abbreviation).

I asked our son about what happened, and he says he can’t remember.  This is a child who loves to tell me every single piece of his day, in detail.  I asked him what he was doing and he said he was “pretending not to be there”.   He was “imagining I was at your house with you, Mom”.

At the end of telling me what happened, our daughter says “ya know the one thing I like about dad?  He gets sooo angry, and then my brother says something funny, and he’ll laugh and not be angry anymore.  When I get angry, I stay angry for a while.”  Hmmm… yes, sweetie… that’s called “borderline personality disorder”, and your dad cycles through shallow ’emotions’ very, very fast, in a disorienting and unstabling kind of way.  The worst is when he says terrible, stunning things, and then says “it didn’t mean anything to me, so I don’t know why you’re letting it bother you.”  Are you kidding me??

 


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