A Win in Court for Child Support

First, I want to apologize.  Over the past month, I have been fairly quiet in posting as I took myself through a month of focusing on personal  healing (there’s always more to do!), and the stress of the holidays.  However, we all had stress through the holidays, and I could have offered more in that arena than staying quiet myself.

The good news is, our first day back to school and the normal grind, January 2nd, was spent in court for me.  Well… that’s not the good news part, of course.  However, it was an amazing four hours of debate.  In my state, child support orders are supposed to stay as is for three years.  If someone wants to modify it before then, there needs to be a change in circumstance to drive that modification.  My ex filed a motion to do so, stating that he was (a) making much less than before, and (b) daycare/after school care costs have decreased.  So the first order of action was to establish if there was an actual change of circumstance.  There was based on (a), but not on (b).  For our support calculations, my income is imputed even though I am not working.   I did that because in order for me to have after school care, I have to be employed.  In the metropolitan area in which I live, it can take years to get into a center for after school care – and my kids have been at the same center since they were babies.  I didn’t want to pull them while looking for a job only to not be able to put them back.

My ex tried to not admit that he was fired from his previous job making a (excuse me) boat-load of money.  My attorney had subpeoned the records but they didn’t return from the company on time.  However, when he was asked on the stand if he was hired for performance, his body language was very telling and my attorney continued to emphasize it.  It was amazing to watch her as she really played into his narcissism on the stand.  She allowed him to declare himself an expert in the marketplace, but then when asked what the top 10 companies which would employ someone with his expertise were, he was unable to say and stated “It’s been a while since I’ve been in the marketplace.”   My ex tried to say that he had sufficiently searched far and wide for a comparable job before focusing on his retail store where he makes 1/5 of his previous salary.  However, he supplied only a couple of emails – and they themselves showed that he was looking for part time work which he could do remotely, and not for a comparable full time job.

My ex also tried to say that he was working at his store so he could spend more time with his children…. but at the same time he said he works 60-80 hours a week, including Saturdays.  He also admitted to having me watch the kids while he worked.  Good golly…

While the way I tell it here makes it seem like a clean case, it wasn’t, and there was much debate about precedent setting cases and what the outcome should be.  However.. in the end… the judge said that it was my ex’s responsibility to pay child support.  Judge said it was great and understandable for my ex to seek a new style of life by being a small business owner, but he needed to do so with his own financial risk.  And… if he had financial obligations like child support, than maybe he had to chose not to do that dream of small business.

So, my kids have child support awarded at basically the same amount as before, and my ex has to pay arrears and my attorney fees.

It was, I have to say, a wonderful day, and a wonderful boundary drawn between us!  For years, his financial issues have always drug me down and even after the divorce continued to do so.  Now it was clearly stated that he had to do so.

WHOO HOO!  We can have victory!!

5 Responses to “A Win in Court for Child Support”

  1. Beth says:

    Yay !!!! Thank you lord.

  2. JenelleMarie says:

    WONDERFUL news and answered prayers. So amazing. Hoping and praying 2013 continues to be victorious and cleansing for you and the children

  3. KariJo says:

    Congrats! That is a HUGE win. I wish more judges had the no nonsense approach yours seemed to have! Happy Holidays and a prosperous New Year!

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